The Impossible

Who knew life would turn out this way?
Who knew I would have this feeling trapped inside of me
like a demon trying to internally take over my soul
from the kindness of my heart. 
I never expected us to be the way things are now. 
But isn't that the beauty in life?
Expecting the unexpected....
I guess?
Mmmm, not always. 

From this day on I lit up into flames. 
Slowly, but surely, 
I broke into pieces 
but funny thing
I was whole on the outside. 
Underneath all this pain and discomfort
I hid it all a way.

Who would've thought
I was going through a unexpected turn in my life?
Who would've thought
this would happen between us? 
I couldn't show that I was hurting.
I had to be strong.
Is this what humans were really made for?
Absolutely not. 

As the days went on, pieces of me felt as if they were disappearing
As if I was slowly disappearing 
To where? No clue. 
But I knew I was entering an impossible side of the world. 
A world in which
I couldn't wrap my head around that fact that someone out there
could've done such a thing
A world in which it was impossible for me to clear my mind
from all the negativity surrounding me
It was the only thing that was surrounding me
there was absolutely no escape. 

This was the impossible. 
It felt as if 
it was impossible to get my life back together
because I knew i'd lost you in my life forever. 
It felt as if
life would never be the same. 
It felt as if
I lost a important piece of my body
because I was slowly disappearing
I couldn't stop it from happening. 

But, I knew I couldn't quit. 
I knew I had a small piece left in me 
that hasn't flown away for a reason. 
There was a light in me and I knew I would escape this.
This world of impossible. 
I wanted to grow something
That something being myself. 
I couldn't live in this darkness for much longer
I needed an escape plan.

A flower can't grow in darkness
and neither can anyone else.
As I tended to my garden, I knew I needed to find that one piece
That was still left in me.
That one piece that was more powerful than the rest.
That one piece that shown light through all the darkness.
It was going to be impossible for me to change the way things are
It was going to be impossible for me to set out the fire
But I knew I had to try and find a way around this fire. 

As I survived the world of impossible, 
I've discovered a better and stronger 
version of myself. 
A version of myself whom I plan on keeping
A version of myself whom I plan to keep growing. 
I thought that it was going to be impossible to escape this world, 
and I proved myself wrong. 
Nothing is impossible in life. 

But in the moment,
this was the "impossible". 

This is a poem I wrote talking about a time in my life where things were rough. This was something I wrote a couple years ago where I felt as if I was drowning and I would keep growing forever. I know I sound very dramatic, but this was a very traumatic time in my life and by writing all my feelings out in this poem helped a lot. This poem was just a start of some random thoughts all meshed together that I was feeling at the time, so forgive me for it not being too much in depth. But, when you’re going through a rough time, your mind isn’t always there. If you know what I mean!

I’ve decided to share this poem with you to help anyone else who’s going through a rough time in their life and need some uplifting. This poem isn’t uplifting, but knowing that you are not alone is what I find very helpful in rough times. We all go through it and it’s important o share your thought with others and not hold everything all in. That was something that I reflected on a after this incident and from then on, i’ve always told myself I will never do that again. This only holds you down even more and it feels life a demon, but it’s truly yourself and your own mindset that’s taking over your body.

Moral of this poem is basically to always talk things out to someone eventually, never give up or think that anything is your fault if you know it isn’t, and always find the light that’s in you because there always is even if you think otherwise. Some advice if you really don’t want to talk to anyone: writing all your thoughts out gets out all your emotions and trust me. You’ll feel 100 times better. Once you lighten up the mood in your mind a bit, reason with yourself and try to think of the positives that you own. This could mean different things so some people. Some may do some self motivation which is great because you shouldn’t think anything is your fault unless you know for a fact it is, but if it isn’t then don’t let anyone or anything tell you otherwise. Others may just cry it out and they feel much better after. There are so many ways to overcome rough times in your life, you just have to reason with yourself and keep it real. This is the only way to get over it and to grow you as an individual, but you will always find a way to do so eventually.

Just remember, everything happens for a reason and some things just take more time than others.

Please leave a comment below if anyone else can relate or would like to share with me on some of your experiences when you felt like you’ve fallen and you would never be able to come back and recover from the injury. I would love to give you some life advice and to let you know you aren’t the only one.

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